A reflection on possibilities
While I may be the first woman in this office, I will not be the last, because every little girl watching tonight sees that this is a country of possibilities.
~Vice President Elect, Kamala Harris
It feels like it’s been awhile since I last shared my reflections of the week. I suppose it has—looking back, it’s been three weeks since my post on sadness. While those thoughts were specific…to the end of what I had thought was the beginning of a renewed commitment…, I suppose there’s been a layer of sadness enveloping me for awhile now. I’ve experienced a lot of loss, as have we all—my relationship (now twice), my job, my pet, my sense of normalcy, even my ability to travel as I otherwise might have with this “gifted” time.
But I’ve also felt sadness with respect to the state of discourse in our society today—the sheer divisiveness in language used seemingly at all levels, across all aisles, surrounding all topics—and our inability, or sometimes refusal, to recognize our shared commonalities. As like many of us, I’ve allowed myself to become distracted by much of this, which has hindered both my direction and my momentum.
Politics aside, this election cycle has renewed my hope and sparked an optimism within me that the future is bright—individually and collectively. I felt an energy in Washington, D.C., where I proudly served alongside 10,000 fellow poll workers to ensure that a record number of D.C. residents cast their ballots, whether for the first time or last time or any number of times in-between. I tuned in as the first <<woman, Black person, Southeast Asian, HBC alumnae, stepmom, child of an immigrant, etc.>> spoke to our nation as our Vice President Elect. I saw clearly, for the first time in awhile, the boundless opportunities surrounding me and us—this idea of a world of possibilities.
I’ve realized that somehow over the years, I’ve allowed for my belief in possibility to diminish. No wonder the sadness that’s been inside me, likely even pre-pandemic! The concept of possibility speaks to our power, our capability, our ability. It is directly connected to our hope, our spirit, our light. And I’ve allowed for mine to diminish over time…
Why? And how might I turn this around?
Perhaps it’s because I’ve been using someone else’s definition of success as my own, rather than identifying my own and striving towards it. Perhaps it’s because I’ve been internalizing a break up or a letting go as an indicator of my self-worth, rather than realizing that my worth can never be taken away by somebody else. Perhaps it’s because I have notoriously ignored my gut, my intuition, my internal wisdom, rather than listening to its whispers (and sometimes shouts) about what it knows better than I.
This last one gives me great pause. Why might we choose to ignore our innate intuition that is there to guide us, steer us, advise us? Sometimes we might just be afraid of what it has to say. Other times, we might presume it’s wrong, as everything external says otherwise. Still yet, we might just not want to accept it as truth for what that would then mean we had to do (or not do).
As a person living in a Western culture, in the 21st century, with a Type A personality, I have over-emphasized “doing” over “being” for most of my life, as it’s accomplishment-driven and far easier to score with respect to the definition of “success”. For me at least, over-emphasizing doing has resulted more times than not in my not trusting my gut.
To counter this, we have to bring into balance the notion of “being”, as it is through being that we learn to harness our unique power of gratitude, intuition, self-worth. We have to cultivate space between tension and stress in order to find contentment and happiness. From this, we can learn to view the world with possibility once again.
Silence isn’t empty. It’s full of answers.
~Zen Proverb
It is through moving. breathing. and being. that I have sought to cultivate this greater connection to myself, to me, to my self in order to redefine my definition of success, to recognize my self-worth and to honour my intuition.
Movement is critical in order to burn off any excess energy so that our breath and our thoughts are not too heavy, our emotions not too dense. It is the gateway to introducing mindful practices.
Attention to breath is important in order to change our state of mind, to alter our emotions. It is the path towards integrating said practices.
Simply being is necessary to cultivate our power and nurture our empowerment. It is the space in which to put into practice mindfulness.
As we turn more towards possibility, towards listening to the answers in the silence, we might choose to slow things down by walking instead of running, by journalling instead of conversing, by contemplating a daily affirmation such as “I am capable” or “I am worthy”. Over time, we learn to sensitize ourselves to ourselves so that we understand where we might feel tension in our body, tightness in our breath, resentfulness in our thoughts…and why.
Yoga, as is any self-care or well-being practice, is mind training—becoming in tune with our own body, breath and mind. As we balance our “doing” and “being” states, we open our hearts and quiet our minds. And if we allow ourselves, we hear our inner child whisper, or shout, about the possibilities that abound.
